halloween drive a.k.a how tampons can kill you

This blog was meant to be a light-hearted look at the ridiculous thoughts that often populate my brain; I strayed from that focus almost instantly. Now, I’d like to get back to it. I figure I could fill a set of encyclopedias with all the quirky, random thoughts and associations that pop in my head on a daily basis. So here goes:

Last night was trick-or-treat in my neighborhood. As I was driving home from work, I had one thought on my mind: Car accidents! (Or, more specifically, the odds that I would get in one on my way home, which at the time, I was convinced were pretty high).

My brain works in a worst-case-scenario kind of fashion. But, of course, even in worst-case-scenario situations, it never chooses to take the logical path. So, not only was I afraid that I would get into a bad car accident, but I also started to worry that maybe it would be a really bad accident and I would have to be hospitalized for a few days. What if nobody realized I was wearing a tampon and I got TSS and died?

I briefly contemplated taping a small piece of paper to my body that said “I’m wearing a tampon,” just in case. I dismissed the thought because I realized it was crazy.